The Leafy Bookshelf

Dirty Secret

Dirty Secret: A Daughter Comes Clean About Her Mother’s Compulsive Hoarding by Jessie Sholl
Memoir, Mental Health, Behavior Sciences (2010)
Last Page… March 18th, 2011 [13/50]

Last Impression: ⚘⚘⚘

There are hoarders in my family - not messy ones, but certainly pack-rat obsessive ones. My grandfather cleans every bottle of peanut butter, every container of baby food, and is constantly searching the clearance aisle to see if there is anything that he “may” need one day in the future. I think at last count, he had close to a thousand dollars in bills for various storage units a month. That is the same as renting a decent apartment! And still there are stacks everywhere in his house - rambling, cluttered stacks of things he can’t be parted with, of things he may need someday, of things he doesn’t even remember.

To his credit, everything is extremely neat and clean - he used to be the administrator of a hospital cleaning service, so he knows how to keep things clean… but he keeps a lot of things, and they all seem to weigh him down with each passing month.

Thankfully, the effect has been diluted through my family line. My mother keeps far more than she needs, for sure, but most of that is scrapbook stuff and can actually be used for art. As for me? I have a nice collection of things, but I purge regularly - at least twice a year - and only buy as many shoes as I need (read: three pairs) among other things.

So it was with interest in my family history and personal awareness of the effects that mess and clutter can have on your life that I picked up Dirty Secret and read it over Spring Break. On some level the book wasn’t what I thought it was going to be - there was no real resolution, no real sense of character growth… but in this case, the characters were real people and this was a fragment of a real, evolving story of their lives. And fragmented it certainly was. 

Part expose into the mentality of hoarding, part coming of age, part mommy issues and all biography, Dirty Secret was decent enough as a light read, but leaves the reader with little or no resolution. There have been no lasting changes and not even any great acceptance of the state of things - simply episode after episode, with drama expressed through active scenes that somehow lacked emotional commitment. A light read, but there were no lessons to take away, no message, no empowering seeds of thought…

The author was certainly honest and straight-forward in presenting how frustrated her life had been, but I wonder if she has yet approached her own resolution and growth with these areas of her life. Until she gets there, how can she properly finish such a story…? In the state it is, the story is interesting, but lacking of real content or resolution.

The Shallows: What the Internet Is Doing to Our Brains

The Shallows: What the Internet Is Doing to Our Brains by Nicholas Carr
Science, Behavior Sciences, Psychology (2010)
Last Page… March 11th, 2011 [12/50]

Last Impression: ⚘⚘⚘⚘⚘!!!

Before we choose our tools and technology, we must choose our dreams and our values, for some technologies serve them, while others make them unobtainable. - Marily Ferguson, The Aquarian Conspiracy

The old botanical metaphors for memory, with their emphasis on continual, indeterminate organic growth, are, it turns out, remarkably apt. Biological memory is alive - computer memory is not. (190)

“We should imitate bees,” Senca wrote, “and we should keep in separate compartments whatever we have collected from our diverse reading, for things conserved separately keep better. Then, diligently applying all the resources of our native talent, we should mingle all the various nectars we have tasted, and then turn them into a single sweet substance, in such a way that, even if it is apparent where it originated, it appears quite different from what it was in its original state.”

Memory, for Seneca, as for Ersa, was as much a crucible as a container. It was more than the sum of things remembered. It was something newly made, the essence of a unique self. (179)  

Learning how to think really means learning how to exercise some control over how and what you think. It means being conscious and aware enough to choose what you pay attention to and to choose how you construct meaning from experience. (195)

We cede control over our attention at our own peril. (195)

“The connecting is the thinking. The connecting is the self.” - William James 1892 lecture on memory

Every tool imposes limitations even as it opens possibilities. The more we use it, the more we mold ourselves to its form and function. (209)

A series of psychological studies over the past twenty years has revealed that after spending time in a quiet, rural setting, close to nature, people exhibit greater attentiveness, stronger memory, and generally improved cognition. Their brains become both calmer and sharper. […] They no longer have to tax their working memories by processing a stream of bottom-up distractions. The resulting state of contemplativeness strengthens their ability to control their mind. (219)

… people who looked at pictures of nature scenes were able to exert substantially stronger control over their attention, while those who looked at city scenes showed no improvement in their attentiveness.
“In sum,” concluded the researchers, “simple and brief interactions with nature can produce marked increases in cognitive control.” Spending time in the natural world seems to be of “vital importance” to “effective cognitive functioning.” (220)

It’s not only deep thinking that requires a calm, attentive mind, it’s also empathy and compassion. […] … the higher emotions emerge from neural processes that “are inherently slow.” (220)

Rosalind Franklin: The Dark Lady of DNA

Rosalind Franklin: The Dark Lady of DNA by Brenda Maddox
Historical Bibliography, Science (2002)
Last Page… March 7th, 2011 [11/50]

Last Impression: ⚘⚘⚘⚘

It was a few years ago and I was lost in the bowels of wikipedia, trying to look up names of famous female scientists throughout history. I had the children of my favorite scientist Sim to name and was finding the list of female scientists disappointingly short. It was from that list that I first learned of Rosalind Franklin - a female scientist whose work was critical in the discovery of how DNA works, but who never received recognition for her work. Work which was used by two male colleagues - Watson and Crick - to eventually net Noble Prizes.

The injustice in that stuck with me for a long time - how DNA works! One of the most important fundamental mysteries that science has unraveled in the last hundred years, and a female scientist untangled most of that web, only to be ignored for her work. As a biology student turned med student the short end of the stick that female scientists get is particularly relevant to me. And again and again through my science classes, her name never came up.

So imagine my surprise when, finally, my microbiology professor not only mentioned her name - but went into great depth over the exact nuances of the way her work had been taken, used, and credit had never truly been given to her for all that effort. Hearing her name during lecture was like being woken up with cold water - I went later and thanked my professor for mentioning her and then he shocked me even further by offering a book from his personal library.

“It’s all about her,” He said. “I think you’ll like it.”

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Creating Sacred Space with Feng Shui

Creating Sacred Space with Feng Shui by Karen Kingston
Spirituality, 1997
Last Page… February 2nd, 2011 [9/50]

Last Impression: ⚘⚘⚘⚘

An excellent book on creating spiritually uplifting environments that I have kept with me for several years now - excellent to re-read right before a big Spring Cleaning, as I did with it this year. The suggestions for how to be aware of space resonated with the way I care for the space that I am in - and a line from Kingston’s book has stayed with me for years…

Whatever your description, realize that what you are looking at is the outer manifestation of your inner self. Everything in your outer life - especially your home environment - mirrors your inner self. Conversely, everything in your home has an affect on you, from the smallest object to the largest design structure.

The story that she tells of Bali are especially enchanting. The various ways to clear and clean space, while enchanting, have lost their power for me over the years… but I believe that by being aware of how others use water, flowers, and crystals to clean their homes of energy, I’ll be able to find my own path and the way that best creates the manifestation of the home I seek to create.

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7 Habits of Highly Effective Families

7 Habits of Highly Effective Families by Stephen R. Covey
Family Relationships, Self-Help, 1997
Last Page… February 1st, 2011 [8/50]

Last Impression: ⚘⚘⚘⚘⚘!!!!

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A Game of Thrones

A Game of Thrones by George R.R. Martin
High Fantasy, 1996
Last Page… January 26nd, 2011 [7/50]

Last Impression: ⚘⚘⚘⚘⚘!!!! - Instant-Ultra-Favorite!

Of all the genres that exist, fantasy is my favorite. It is the balm for my soul, the thread of magic that can weave along the edges of a life that has otherwise been difficult, mundane, and seems so often to be for naught. Fantasy writings - those of other authors and my own - set me free in a way nothing else does in this world. Through fantastic writing, I am given wings into rich, vibrant worlds that masterfully awaken, shape, and sculpt my imagination into places, people, events, and stories that I would have never dreamed of on my own.

Although it seems somewhat extreme, the passion and devotion I have to giving rise to my imagination through reading and writing fantasy works is as extreme, deep, and true as the passion and devotion I give to my heart-family, those I have and will always lay down my life for. Because it is through fantasy and the reading of it that I fly. That I experience a richness in life that, with the closing of the last page, makes me grateful to be alive because I had the opportunity and blessing of being able to have experienced such inspiring stories.

And A Game of Thrones is a work of utter brilliance and a gem of the art of writing and story-telling.

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Way to Be! 9 Ways To Be Happy And Make Something Of Your Life

Way To Be! 9 Ways To Be Happy And Make Something Of Your Life by Gordon B. Hinkley
Spiritual, 2002
Last Page… January 22nd, 2011 [6/50]

Last Impression: ⚘⚘½

When I last read this book it was supposed to one of the key books in my life - an important tool for a young Mormon teenager to keep on hand to help guide them through their life. I remember being impressed - relieved even - to have some guidance in my life, years ago, when I read it from time to time when I felt confused.

But when I picked it up for just that reason, years and many experiences later, I could only stare in disappointment at the pages. Yet, as good a man as Gordon B. Hinkley was, what else did I expect from a powerful white man who led one of the largest patriarchal religions in the world and was generations removed from my own?

There are certainly nuggets of wisdom - the importance of education, reading, and striving to improve yourself - that I agree with… but there were far more things that divided the world into rigid rules that had little foundation or reasoning and severe punishments, as well as strict gender roles.

And, finally, there was the tone - the tone that reminded me of the exact tone that ran through many in the church, when I was still attending. Yes, there is love and kindness and a lot of good things… but there is also this sensation of egalitarianism behind everything, even while someone is saying being humble is an important virtue. A slight lisp at the end of every statement that seems to challenge - seems to say, “I’m better than you.”

And that… just didn’t mesh with where I am going spiritually. A much freer place - a much broader, open, more loving place. So I closed this book, for the last time, and I’ll take away what I think could be useful… and rather than fret over the end of my soul, like it cautions me to, I’ll do what I can to make the most of my life instead.

The Power of Now

The Power of Now by Ekhart Tolle
Spirituality, Psychology, 1999
Last Page… January 20th, 2011 [5/50]

First Impression: ⚘⚘⚘⚘⚘ | Instant-Favorite

One of the few books that has powerful changed my life with a depth and scope that words seem a poor medium for expressing the spiritual, emotional, and mental change that rippled into my life after the turning of each of these pages. Tolle stands as a new spiritual guide for our age - one of, admittedly, plenty that we already have and few seem to be doing anyone any good. And yet.

Perhaps it is because of my affinity for solitude and my sensitivity to change - to the rippling effects that even thoughts themselves have an the environment around them. The slow turning of the forces of life within my chest, yearning to return to a balance and center far deeper than the surface levels of this world.

And they are surface levels. Constructed realities that mask reality. These masks are Time… Emotion… Ego. Wearing them, we become blind on a level so deep we lose our connection to the reality of life around us. Of the cosmic connection that is true - it is a fact we, as our awareness, occupy a rock turning slowly in space, surrounded by a seemingly infinite number of stars. We occupy the only known source of life in all the universe we have yet seen and yet… and yet…

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The Exiled Queen

The Exiled Queen by Cinda Williams Chima 
Young Adult Fantasy, 2010
Last Page… January 17th 2011 [4/50]

First Impression: ⚘⚘⚘½

The sequel to The Demon King - picked up the very night I returned from Austin because it would be something light to read. Surprisingly it was an easy read, even somewhat enjoyable at parts.

The plot begins to move to other countries and advances the growth of the heroine Princess in ways that deviate enough - if not entirely - from other fantasy stories that they become interesting. Humorous moments and certain story twists that delve into the nature of magic in this world start a line of curiosity that kept me reading through the rest of the book. Some parts are still too transparent or simple for my taste, but they would be good for helping the YA reader establish themselves in understanding the normal ebb and flow of a fantasy genre that is more politically focused - perhaps wee little training wheels for the eventual epics of A Game of Thrones.

I also sincerely appreciated the frank and empowered way that sex was approached in this book - out there, open, and speaking to the teen audience in a manner that didn’t add shame or a preachy message. Indeed, knowing this was YA literature and reading a few of the scenes - none of which actually resulted in sex, but still - made me lift and eyebrow. Some people may say that this is encouraging teenagers to ruin their lives by not scaring them off sex - and others, like me, would say that this presentation paints a realistic result of what teenagers who have the hots for one another do when left alone in a bedroom long enough and then takes it a step further and makes it a subject with realistic expectations and boundaries for both parties. Not to mention the women were leading the encounters in this book - and not in ways that labeled them “sluts,” either.

It isn’t often that a sequel can actually make me change my mind about a series, but I really did enjoy reading this book. If not on a level that challenged the reader and dreamer in me, on a level that enjoyed seeing how a story was woven together with refreshing elements for a younger audience. There are still gaps in the strength of the story - characters alternate between powerful to nothing to stupid to brilliant with no clear rhyme or reason - and my suspension of disbelief faltered at key plot points, but otherwise… decent enough. If my Aunt gets the next book, I’ll probably pick it up for a lazy afternoon reading spell. 

The Demon King

The Demon King by Cinda Williams Chima
Young Adult Fantasy, 2009
Last Page… January 13th, 2011 [3/50]

First Impression: ⚘⚘⚘

A Young Adult fantasy book that my Aunt suggested I read - I was hesitant, but to my surprise I’ve enjoyed it far more than I thought I would.

The characters have original traits, though as with all characters certain predictable roles and behaviors from those roles are in place, but they are rather well written and original for a young adult fantasy. The setting is rather original and tied in elements of different cultures - pseudo Native American - without making me cringe, which was immensely refreshing.

What often made my interest wane was how the significance of the story seemed to fluctuate - how large the nations were and how powerful important political figures were never stayed consistent enough to flesh out a clear mental image in my mind. There was a lot of focus on what clothes people were wearing, but at least this had the upside of letting me know what characters looked like and let me know what materials were used in the land.

The plot was entertaining enough, though predictable in places and dubious in others. There were also enough action scenes to provide some interest, even if the writing left much of the description up to the imagination.

All in all, rather predictable, but there were some fresh elements and it was just interesting enough to make me curious about the next book… but more to see more of what appears to be a unique world, rather than because I care about the characters or the plot.

Intensive Care: The Story of a Nurse

Intensive Care: The Story of a Nurse by Echo Heron
Non-fiction, 1988
Last Page… January 8th 2011 [2/50]

First Impression: ⚘⚘⚘⚘⚘ | Instant-Favorite

The moment that I saw Intensive Care sitting in a small, white built-in bookshelf in a tiny indie coffeehouse in Austin was one of the most potently humbling and euphoric moments of my life - and that was before I even turned to the first page.

The day had begun with such promise - we were going to walk the crowded street of South Congress in Austin, flitting between the eccentric collection of shops that lined the road like a string of ecliptic glass beads, each one utterly unique, bursting with personality, and different from its neighbor. Unfortunately there is a reason that it is the crowded street of South Congress - there wasn’t a parking spot to be found for love or money and eventually my mate and her friend, K, gave up and decided to go elsewhere.

So we drove out to one of my favorite places in Austin - the Zilker Botanical Garden, a beautiful layout of flowers and bamboo, streams and rustling leaves, koi fish and rose gardens… … and then traffic, streaming in and out of the beautiful parkland all around the, blocked us from being able to make the turn. Despite my pleas, the mate and K took this as a sign to try somewhere else. A coffee shop.

Crushed that two of my favorite places to explore had been so tantalizingly held in front of me and then yanked away - and then we were going to a coffee shop where they would participate in a meeting that I was not part of for hours - I entered a rare state for me. The mope. 

Glowering at life in general, a firm pout in progress, I wandered around the shop while they ordered this and that and disappeared for their meeting. It wouldn’t have been so bad, except in anticipation of the gardens I had left behind all the heavy things from my bag - meaning, I had an empty bag with no journal and no books. That is an unheard of condition for me, not having my journal at the very least on hand, and I was already dying of boredom.

And then - I saw the book.

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